Македонија на Uncyclopedia

Macedonia

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The flag of the country formerly known as the "Former Yugoslav Republic of Macedonia".

Macedonia Македонија, (pronounced "Make-It-Own-Ya!") is formerly known as the Former Yugoslav Republic of Macedonia (and it is actully part of Japan which however is not recognized by the world, because of the dispute with Faroe Islands) , the full name of this country is now Tcfkatfyrom (The country formerly known as the former Yugoslav Republic of Macedonia), a title it adopted after achieving independence from the United Nations in 1991, following the collapse of the vowel industry (voulkaputskij) in neighbouring Yugoslavia. Though this name may seem unwieldy to English speakers, in the local language it is represented by a single sound which may be transliterated into the Latin alphabet as "crzvpjt". How this sound exactly sounds few can tell, cause it is unable to caught it on audio tape due to its unspecified frequency. The Macedonian flag shows the letter which represents this sound in the Macedonian alphabet.

The majority of the population declares themselves as Macedonian; however, they have no relation to Ancient Macedonia of Alexander the Great, and if they say they do, please point out that they are confused and should seek Ethnic Counseling. According to Professor Macca, the Macedonian SlavoSkopian identity developed in the late XVIII century, although most historians today agree that Macedonians are just Bulgarians who live too close to Albanians. However, under hypnosis, most people worldwide will start speaking a traditional Macedonian dialect in that they will emit sounds like "grnche" or "shtipalkata", therefore proving, beyond doubt, that humanity has its orgigins in the village of Jurumljare or Bulachani.

The Macedonian state was first created in 1943 as a federal entity of communist Yugoslavia by any one of the three leaders of the Yugoslav resistance, all named Josip Broz Tito (it is still unclear which one on them it was) and as such represents the first virtual state in cyberspace as it was occupied by Nazi Germany for two more years before physical independence. Thus, the Internet was invented in Macedonia, by Macedonians and for Macedonians. Wireless was also invented in Macedonia many centuries ago, as recent excavations have found absolutely no wires.

Previously it was full of Turkeys until they were driven out by Franz Ferdinand, Gavrilo Princip and Boy George during the Worst World War. Macedonia was then invaded by Alexander Battenburg, a cake maker and expert in fancy icing, waving the Treaty of San Stefano and a lock of Oscar Wilde's hair. Alexander Battenburg slipped on the Grease and was helped up by Stamboliskii a pastry cook from Narnia.

One of the three Titos also created federal states of Nokia (with the capital of Adidas-Ali Babas), and Pepsistan, but had to reinstate the previous regimes after he was fined a hefty sum for patent violations. Regime change was apparently patented by Jorgos Dubelvelios Busos in ancient Athens and due to subsequent patent durex extensions over centuries, has wound up in the property of an obscure religious cult in Nagorna Amerikistania.

John Lennon has never visited Macedonia. George Harrison on the other hand, had intentions to visit Macedonia, but his pilots couldn't find it on the map. And when they finally found it, they couldn't land on it cause it was too small and their plane just fly over it. After few unsuccessful attempts they retrieved, and George Harrison got into a great depression.

Hazel O'Connor made the film Breaking Glass after visiting a Macedonian evening hosted by Bhaktivedanta Swami Prabhupada in an effort to revive the pink blanket industry.

Current Developments

In a recently proposed United Nations resolution it has been suggested that the name of the Country Formerly known as the Former Yugoslav Republic of Macedonia be changed to the "The Country Formerly known as the Former Yugoslav Republic of Macedonia".

It was soon-after realised, however, that this already was the former country's former name. Namely, it was its current name. Realising that the name was confusing, it was officially changed to "Greece"(with quotation marks). Protests by Greek diplomats meant that the name was changed to the "Country that was Formerly known as Greece, but is not Greece". Further mayhem ensued. On the suggestion of China, the country was designated as being "Greece 2.1", as opposed to the real Greece, which was called "Greece - Original Flavour".

Having two countries with the name "Greece" caused many problems like hardware conflicts, packages being delivered to the wrong country, diarrhea and ass pain. Therefore the new Chinese tall government sponsored UN resolution to finally dissolve this issue, leading to the present day situation :

Greece - Original Flavor' is now known by its original name: "Greece", with the permission to refer to this country with it's constitutional and highly popular name "hell ass".

While Greece 2.1 is now the following:

'The Country Formerly Known as Greece 2.1 Formerly Known as Greece, Previously the Country Formerly Known as the Former Yugoslav Republic of Macedonia, Formerly Being the Same Name, i.e. the Country Formerly Known as the Former Yugoslav Republic of Macedonia'

In that way, the Chinese 'tall' government found a solution to satisfy both sides, especially the Greek side. And hence, they found an 'unambiguous' name for Macedonia which basically states the same, but now the Greek side is satisfied finally.

Footnote

It is official : Greeks have no sense of humour !